1. Complete.

100 pounds and 14 sizes smaller.

Today is the day I was supposed to be at goal...

but I weight the same as when I started this count down. I'm not disappointed,  dissatisfied or discouraged.  Instead I am optimistic,  relieved and renewed. For I understand  this is a non-linear process which requires a lifestyle change and a whole lot of persistence.

I've made peace with the process.

I'm no longer angry about food; what I cannot and should not eat. I went through days of beating myself up over unhealthy choices but a new mindset allowed forgiveness. I am human and I will have bad days. I make mistakes and will fall back sometimes.  The point is not to stray far from the optimal goal: live a long healthy life and adapt to the lifestyle that will allow me to get there. This means smiling when I order a salad. Being proud of myself for choosing the fruit instead of a chocolate bar and if I don't make a healthy choice I don't make the "old me" type of scandal. These days, if I make an unhealthy choice and I make sure the next one is a healthy one. I seek balance.

Yes, I am still not at goal and while reflecting over my journey I realized: I'm healthier than I was 1 -2 - 3 - 4- 5 - ... 12 years ago!! I am thinner, stronger and leaner. I am at the perfect spot and self-love makes me want to go the extra mile. Self-love makes me want to loose the next 84 pounds!  I feel complete in knowing I give each and every day my best - whatever that may look like. I truly forgive myself for not being perfect. I am living the best way I know how and I am in the process of positive changes in my life.

The mindset that helped me get where I am today.

1. Forgive myself.  For not being perfect,  for slipping sometimes, for being so hard on myself.  

2. Love myself.  Honor my mind, body and soul. Treat my body with honor and respect. Instead of being critical over what I am not doing I must remind myself to simply say, I love you, to myself.

3. One step at a time. I make grand goals and there have been set-backs. There will be days when I push hard and others when all I can do is apply a small change to stay on target. This is when I remind myself that I just need to take it day by day, moment by moment. 

4. Play hard. Stating I'll take it day by day does not mean I'm not playing hard. When I'm healthy - no vertigo, no pain - I play real hard because I love waking up knowing I gave each moment the best I could. This may also apply when the emotional part tries to take over. I just have to get up and rise above it all and play hard in every area of my life i.e. work, home etc.  

5. Share yourself with others. Some people appreciate my story and they will be inspired to make changes in their own life. If I can help another individual through their journey then I'm satisfied knowing I made a contribution and difference in someone elses life. 

6. What others think of me is none of my business.  Life is too short to worry or to live concerned about what someone else thinks about me. For example, I give each work out and each class my best. I may look foolish to some but I'm having fun and simply taking care of me. 

7. Be grateful.  I have been given the opportunity to embrace this new way of living and thinking.  I am grateful for every moment. 

8. Be happy. It is a state of mind and happiness will get me much further than fear, doubt, anger, depression etc. A smile truly goes a long way. 

9. Be mindful. Being mindful is a daily practice. Yoga helps me reach true consciousness. I am successful when I practice mindful eating and mindful living. 

10. Enjoy the process because there is no finish line. It is truly a journey.

I thank you for reading about my journey. May you live a healthy and inspired life.

Here's to sharing.

18. Vamonos.

I'm in action mode. I tell myself, Don't wait another minute and give up the struggle. Why? Because at the end of the day I feel a whole lot better when I workout (even if its just 20 minutes). The PiYo / Yoga work out schedule has been been good. Double work-outs are no longer a must. Instead I stick to the schedule and add activity when I can.

This allows me to take care of me and takes the stress out of it. It makes me feel good when I do more activity
; instead of feeling bad or guilty because I did not do it all.

Now I have to apply the same thought pattern to food. The mindful eating training helped and I must keep it present.

To keeping it positive.

33. Be Present.

Day 9

I will appreciate the people with whom I am eating and try hard to be present and truly listen to what they are saying rather than just planning my response. If I am eating alone, I'll notice my thoughts and let them flow without judgment or necessarily action.

32. Mindful Eating Closure.

Day 10

I will pay attention to the food I have eaten and notice how it affected my mood and my energy. If I don't like the way I feel, I will not berate myself with negative self-talk, but will rather note the feeling and remind myself before eating that food again in the future. If I feel good, I will note that, too, and be grateful for that experience.

Today I Shine.